Passed Out Pete Pees on PrideIt’s Wednesday. There are 517 days until the midterm elections. Passed Out Pete’s ugly war on Pride, Trump’s scariest lie yet and a cussing oversight endorsement.Be advised: This newsletter uses profanity. Majorie Taylor Greene doesn’t know that because she can’t read. Note: Well, Sexy Patriots, it happened. Democrats are actually in disarray. Actually, that’s not the right way to put it. Democrats are in shock. Why? Because we found ourselves agreeing with one of the most repugnant human beings in the history of this cursed planet. Now even someone on ketamine, mushrooms and Ecstasy can see it. Tue, 03 Jun 2025 22:31:06 GMT View on BlueskyUm… we don’t know what to say. We kinda sorta agree with Elon Leon? Are we a week away from finding ourselves stroking our chins and nodding while thinking that maybe Jiggly Dudeboobs (JD) Vance has some good points about sexing up furniture?! We were so shocked to find ourselves kinda sorta agreeing with Elon Leon that we started digging through his 4,000 tweets a day to see if there was anything else we agreed with. Here are a few that blew our minds…
Well, SPs, we’re flummoxed. We had no idea we could agree so much with such a total piece of shit. Man, we sure wish these were real. Or we wish Elon Leon would crawl up his own butt and disappear. And that means we’re now agreeing with Mike Johnson. What a weird time. Y’all have a blessed day. Note two: Btw, Elon Leon is mad because this already cruel bill doesn’t hurt enough Americans. So he can still go fuck himself and then eat shit. But goddamn it sure is hilarious watching him crap all over the GOP’s whole ball of wax. More: The Guardian Note three: We haven’t talked about it much, but that’s about to change. Are y’all ready for the No Kings rallies on June 14? More: Philadelphia Inquirer Note four: We weren’t kidding about that MTG thing. Someone should have told her that reading is fundamental. And that Jewish space lasers aren’t a thing. And that she sucks. More: The Guardian Note five: This is a pretty important warning from a weatherman. We admire his calm. The script we wrote for him was just screaming TRUMP IS GOING TO FUCKING KILL US ALL!!!! Note six: Trump wants Congress to help him kill kids and Big Bird. More: HuffPost Note seven: Things keep getting worse for John Fettermanchin. He just lost his chief of staff and the Philly Inquirer, one of the best papers in the nation, is calling for him to resign if he won’t do his job. Ouch. More: The Guardian Note eight: We saw people making fun of Democrats for handing out tacos outside of the RNC, but we think it’s pretty funny. It’s ok to try creative shit in this political environment. In fact, it’s a must. More: Axios Note nine: Law professor Kate Shaw took Josh Hawley to school yesterday, and it was delicious. We assume Hawley pissed himself and then ran away. But that’s his go-to move. More: HuffPost Note 10: We fucking love watching Zelensky embarrass Putin and Trump. Reporter: He said Zelenskyy didn't have the cards when they met in the oval office a few months back. Does Zelenskyy possibly have some cards that the president hadn't known about? ![]() Tue, 03 Jun 2025 17:33:43 GMT View on BlueskyNote 11: Monica Crowley wants people to sing Happy Birthday to Trump at his fucking parade. We’re in but only if we add the lesser known verse about him getting syphilis (again) and shitting himself into oblivion. More: HuffPost Note 12: Yikes. Now we kinda sorta agree with Trump on something. Because we hate his SCOTUS picks too. Probably for different reasons though. More: CNN Note 13: This “guffaw” might have done permanent damage to our dude parts. Tammy Bruce: "The thing that matters when it comes to American policy and what's happening is what President Trump thinks and says." ![]() Tue, 03 Jun 2025 18:47:04 GMT View on BlueskyNote 14: It seems pretty obvious that Trump wants more women to die. But only because his administration is saying it. More: Associated Press Note 15: Gretchen Whitmer says she called Trump to tell him she doesn't want him to pardon the guys who tried to kidnap her. There are about 50 things in that sentence that make us want to hurl. More: WILX Note 16: The brain worm butthead is gonna take a hard look at baby formula. That is very, very bad news for babies and people who like them. More: Associated Press Note 17: Call this dude butter because he’s on a roll… Note 18: For today’s Happy Ending, we take you to South Carolina, where Democrat Keishan Scott won a special statehouse election over his Republican opponent by 41 POINTS!!! Harris only won the district by five! People are pissed. No wonder Elon Leon is jumping starship. More: WISTV Note 19: And on that encouraging note, let’s go do some news! We sure hope y’all are having an awesome week! And if not, just remember it could be worse — your ketamine-cooked buddy could be shitting all over you in public. Love y’all! Pete pisses on Pride Um what? A rare cussing endorsement Today’s clips The 88-year-old Holocaust survivor who was burned during an attack by a man armed with a "makeshift flamethrower" had a message on Tuesday for the rest of America: "We are better than this." More: NBC News White House deputy chief of staff Stephen Miller desperately attempted to make the case for President Donald Trump’s “big, beautiful bill” on Tuesday after Elon Musk tore into the bill, calling it a “disgusting abomination.” More: Mediaite Longtime academic Santa Ono was rejected Tuesday for the University of Florida presidency by the state university system board amid sharp criticism from political conservatives about his past support for diversity, equity and inclusion programs and other initiatives they view as unacceptable liberal ideology. More: HuffPost The latest from Adam |
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Wednesday, June 4, 2025
Passed Out Pete Pees on Pride
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