Middleboro Review 2: ICYMI: GOP senator rants about King Kong's dong on Fox News

Saturday, July 11, 2026

ICYMI: GOP senator rants about King Kong's dong on Fox News

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IMPORTANT ISSUES! THESE ARE NOT SOLICITATIONS

Graham Platner drops out of Maine Senate race after sexual assault allegations

GOP senator compares socialism to King Kong's genitalia for some reason
Louisiana Republican John Kennedy, who once famously turned heads — and stomachs — in a 2023 Senate committee hearing on book banning, wherein he awkwardly read literary passages about dildos and strap-ons out loud to his baffled colleagues, apparently decided it was time to remind Americans of his enduring obsession with all things phallic during an absolutely wild Fox News interview yesterday.

Speaking with Kellyanne Conway, Kennedy went on a ludicrous rant about progressive Democrats wanting to "kill all the millionaires" before weirdly declaring that the list of countries that have "tried socialism and rejected it" was "as long as King Kong’s genitalia."

We know "Freud would have a field day" is an overused phrase, but, honestly, in this case he really would.

Take Action: Demand Congress stop Trump's attack on our elections!

VIDEO OF THE DAY: Judge hits Trump with major new ruling in E. Jean Carroll case
It's starting to look like Donald's yearslong bid to avoid paying E. Jean Carroll the $5 million (plus interest!) in defamation damages after a civil court found him credibly liable for rape has finally reached the end of the line. Brian Tyler Cohen discusses what comes next after a Manhattan federal appeals court rejected his latest ruse to avoid accountability.

Take Action: Demand your members of Congress restore funding for public media now!

The world’s biggest polluter is fueling our World Cup fun
Conservation Law Foundation: The World Cup is happening right now, in American cities baking in triple-digit heat — heat that climate scientists directly link to fossil fuel pollution. Ironically, the company currently bankrolling the biggest sporting event on earth is the single largest corporate polluter in human history, the Saudi Arabian oil company ARAMCO, which is solely responsible for 4% of ALL climate-change pollution since 1965. Add your name to tell FIFA to drop ARAMCO as a sponsor ASAP and stop allowing corporate polluters to sportswash their reputations!

Trump claims he ended war in which "15 million people had their heads chopped off"
Folks, we can't believe this one flew under our radar, but Donald J. Trump, Ender of Many Great Wars, personally swooped in and halted genocidal hostilities between the Democratic Republic of the Congo and Rwanda last year. According to the great peacemonger, "15 million people had their heads chopped off" before he stepped in and magically ended the conflict.

"I should've won that award more than anybody that ever received the Nobel Peace Prize, because nobody’s settled wars. I settled eight of them. Because I’m a certain type of personality, I was able to settle them," Trump said. Oh, he's a certain type of personality alright.

Take Action: End gun violence for ALL Americans! Don't build a ballroom!

Trump claims Tehran called and "want to make a deal so badly" after second night of strikes
The interminable game of strikes followed by empty promises of negotiations in a desperate attempt to manipulate the markets and stave off the looming global economic catastrophe of Trump's own creation continues. He has to know this can't work forever...right?

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Donald Trump’s dismissive answer to Mitch McConnell’s health raises all the eyebrows
The president hilariously torpedoed his own party's efforts to "Weekend at Mitch's" the possibly brain-dead Kentucky senator by straight-up admitting that he has no idea what his health status is. You know Donald is telling the truth, because as a certified McConnell Hater, he can't be bothered to do the "oh he's just resting" song and dance that the rest of Republican leadership is desperately trying to perform. If the PRESIDENT doesn't know what's going on with Mitch...does this cover-up go all the way up to the top? Many people are saying this.

Hostile crowd shreds Nebraska GOP rep during town hall as crowd boos Trump’s policies
Republican Rep. Mike Flood faced a *cough* flood of criticism at a town hall outside Omaha yesterday, where angry constituents repeatedly drowned him out with boos and jeers when he tried to talk up Donald Trump's Big Bill of Bullshit or justify slashing food stamps while giving the ultra wealthy even further tax cuts. Suffice it to say, if things are this contentious in deep-red Nebraska, the upcoming midterms are going to be quite the reckoning for the GOP. Couldn't happen to a more deserving bunch.

Beloved Alaskan Mary Peltola drops love letter to Alaska in inspiring first TV ad
Mary Peltola for Alaska: US Senate candidate Mary Peltola is a native Yup'ik who has spent her entire life working for Alaska, and her genuine love for the state and its people flies off the screen. "When I think of an Alaskan, I think about somebody who has a genuine connection to the land and the people and the experience of living and growing and raising a family here," says one man. "Every Alaskan I have ever known, no matter how young, no matter how old, no matter where they're from, deeply understand the importance of making sure our kids and grandkids and all the generations after us have the same kind of abundance that we had. We can get back there if we're all working on this together." It's the perfect message for a positive campaign that connects directly to voters and is even more powerful considering that incumbent Republican Senator Dan Sullivan is a transplant from Ohio. Click here to watch her ad and chip in to help elect her to this must-win Senate seat!

Trump questions Platner accuser: "A lot of people say big falsehoods"
Gee, what on earth would compel Donald Trump to suddenly come to the defense of Graham Platner, a man he has routinely attacked as a "pig," "thug," and "major sleaze bag?" Speaking to reporters aboard Air Force One, the serial philander — who has been credibly accused of sexual assault by more than 20 women himself — chimed in on Platner's imperiled Senate campaign: "It’s really a question of whether or not you believe the woman. A lot of people say big falsehoods." Uh huh. Like, say, at least 20 or so people, maybe?

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Aaron Schwartz/Bloomberg/Getty Images

Trump Transportation secretary says bike lanes are DEI
That's right. Bike lanes? DEI. Buses? Full-blown Maoism. America must not be allowed to deviate from the Sacred Word of the Ford F350 Super Duty PowerStroker Toddler Obliterator!

excerpt:

Transportation Secretary Sean Duffy announced Tuesday that his department would redirect $1.73 billion in Biden-era grants away from establishing “DEI bike lanes” to build roads and bridges instead.

So, what exactly is a “DEI bike lane?”

Trump's Qatari jumbo jet already grounded as Secret Service insist president continue flying on old Air Force One
With cost-of-living and affordability concerns at the forefront of most Americans' minds, we can definitely all agree that the $400 million in taxpayer funds the US Air Force spent on security upgrades to the Boeing 747 Qatari officials "gifted" to Trump was money well spent, right? Right?

New poll shows Graham Platner's likely replacement beating Susan Collins by 5% while both Platner and Janet Mills lose
We know this Maine Senate race looks like a disaster for Democrats...but what if it's actually a blessing in disguise? Before the primary, Chuck Schumer and the DSCC made it clear to other Maine hopefuls that former Governor Janet Mills was going to be their choice and that no one else should bother running, which led to insurgent Graham Platner coming out of nowhere and easily demolishing Mills in the primary.

Now that Platner has dropped out, the lane is once again open for a newcomer to take up the baton...like former Maine Senate President Troy Jackson, who voters seem to like a lot more than both Platner, Mills, AND Collins! Just...as the prophecy foretold?