George Santos (Song Parody)

The story of George Santos is so epic and bizarre it should only be told in the form of a Western ballad. To the tune of "El Paso" by Marty Robbins. Lyrics: Up in New York was a man named George Santos He ran for Congress in the borough of Queens This was a time when the people were restless A time after face masks and long quarantines There was one problem for this young Brazilian: His background was boring with no résumé He needed something to interest the voters He’d make up some stories and claim that he’s gay One night Republican donors came in, With checkbooks and money for him, They asked him, “are you gay?” So he baked them a souffle And sang them some showtunes as if that was proof And they asked him, if He could do something ‘bout being Latino ‘Cause with the New York GOP that won’t fly Their challenge was answered in less than a heart-beat; He said “What if I’m Jew-ish” with a wink in his eye As a matter of fact my own grandmother perished, She was brutally murdered in Hitler’s war crimes, And wait ‘till you hear what became of my mother, It turns out that she has died multiple times Then as November’s election approached, The GOP offered advice Don’t talk immigration Just mention inflation And for God’s sake don’t mention your mother died twice And it turned out that Voters elected that man named George Santos But they did not know just who they voted for And they left all the rest of us in quite a quandary As we all figure out how to show him the door. -- Lyrics by Patrick Fitzgerald Music from: https://youtu.be/vwfQZNNUbyQ